12/20/19 -- Here's to hoping (in Christ) that 2020 is so much better than this year has been. This year has been so, so, I worked for a part of the year, not working right now, since September. Really sucks, that I haven't been working, even part time, would be fine.
There is still zero communication between my son and I. I can't even get him to comment on text messages without him thinking that I want to talk about the past. So, despite how I feel I need to just let him go and do his thing. I am praying that reality will "smack" him in the face to realize that he needs his mom, in his and his daughters' lives. I so want to just be a grandma to my granddaughters and leave the past alone. I have zero interest in rehashing the past, in anyway shape or form, yet either he thinks so or his wife does. All that to say, they do seem ready, and I don't understand it but I can't control it, either.
Right now, I am in a rather bad situation, with my car and rent. My car needs about $900 worth of work on it, rather soon, too. The passenger side, front wheel bearing is going out and the tie rod is broke or breaking. According to the mechanic, I have some time - like it's not going to fall apart in the next day or weeks. However, this is something that I NEED get repaired very soon. Even if I was working I wouldn't be able to afford to get this work done. Geezlaweez, the car was given to me but I have had to put money into it that I wasn't expecting or thinking. Keeping the oil changed is something that I know, always has to be kept up, but new rear brake drums and now this with the passenger front side is ridiculous.
