Trouble

5/16/19 -- Today was a, no work, day.  I am definitely bummed because I didn't have to go to work at the printing co. that I have been working for, on a temp. basis.  The department that I am working in, is the mailroom, and is solely based on the amount of work that need to be done.  So, essentially I have been on a daily basis.  I wait to receive a text, from the boss, as to whether I should come in or not. Here lately, I have been working Mon. - Wed. for sure then Thurs., and Friday are the iffy days.  Last week I worked on Thursday but not Friday.  I do like work simply because it, sort of, keeps my mind off things that bother me.
  I did reach out to my Pastor friends, last week, and he told me on Sunday, that sometime, this week.  Well, so far, nothing has materialized.  He did tell me that He was definitely book thru Tuesday, when I asked him about Wed and the rest of the week.  He finally got back to me about today, and told that he ended up getting booked up on Wednesday, and that he would get back to me today, as far as, today and even tomorrow.  I have been really struggling with stuff to the point of the potential going back to that super dark place.
  Mom is the one who mentioned that I am stuck....I am stuck and I feel that if something doesn't change there is the potential for me to go back to that really dark place. I really need and want to talk.  I don't want to go back to that place and I am really hoping that he will have a solution or insight.