2/15/15 -- Well, I hope you all had a great Valentine's Day, for those of you who have spouses or girl or boyfriends. For me it was just another day, as I have no one who thinks me special enough to give me anything for valentine's day. Even when I was married my husband wasn't the romantic at all! Not only that I had many errands to run and it was very COLD!!!! I had someone steal my debit card number and make some online purchases, a couple of weeks ago, thankfully my credit union caught it and put a stop to and cancelled my card plus there was a watch company that called me to check a purchase and when I said not to authorizing the purchase, she reimbursed my account cause my card had been cancelled that morning. I had to order and new card and wait two weeks for a new one which here, however it has dawned on me that I don't have any protection on this laptop so I won't be making any online purchases or paying bills til I can have norton downloaded onto this laptop. I didn't have this problem on my other laptop cause I had norton on it. Duh!
Well, there was an interesting development this last week. I may have mentioned in the last blog that a meeting between my son and I and a neutral mediator was tentatively scheduled for this past week. There was a possibly one to happen on Monday but that fell thru. So, I waited and waited and waited but nothing followed til Thursday. On Thursday I received and email from the Pastor that I wasn't happy about, at all! It basically said that my son wasn't ready, that he wants to get this resolved but the Pastor sensed some reservation and possibly some fear. Now, in my anxiousness and emotion I was angry and aggravated and irritated and overly emotional. I responded to the Pastor's email with somethings that probably weren't really nice. When he responded I seriously had to send an apology email.
To top everything off, the Pastor is on vacation for two weeks, which means this won't get resolved for another 3-4 weeks. I say that because there was an indication that he might have to meat with my son a couple times before my son would be ready to meet with me.
Talk about an emotional roller coaster! I have lost so much sleep during this last week and now this migraine is very intense this morning, so I didn't go to church this morning.
I know that this reconciliation isn't going to happen unless my son is ready and willing so ultimately there is no rushing it. I know that God has a reason for the delay of this reconciliation and I just have to continue to trust in Him. I just have no choice!
I gotta say that this has been one heck of a roller coaster ride of emotion. I have never been on such a ride in my entire life! My divorce wasn't as bad as this as become! Even the chasm that is between my middle sister and I doesn't bother me like this! The reason for that is; my sister and I have never really had a relationship. Even as we were growing up we weren't all that close, we are as different as night and day and were pretty much at each other's throats. Needless to say, my parents didn't do too much to help us create a relationship either. I think we fought a lot like they did when we were growing up.
So, I don't know if Cheryl and I can have a relationship now, Cheryl has such a personality that I don't know if she would be willing to cooperate with anyone who would want to try to institute or facilitate a mediated meeting.
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