1/20/15 -- You know I really can't believe that we are in the middle of January and I still am not working consistently. My boss and I were both hoping that this year would start off differently than it did last year, so far, it hasn't. This truly sucks!!
The thought crossed my mind a couple of weeks ago, to have a third party intervene in the the situation between my son and I. It just seems like things are moving extremely slowly, a lot slower than I anticipated after bringing it to the Pastor's attention. I didn't expect instant resolution but I know that the Pastor did "drop the ball" somewhat til recently, I actually had to remind them of some thing and now one of the elders who is the worship leader is in more of the know than he was. Anyway, I spoke to the Youth Pastor about bringing in a third party (a pastor from the church that I am currently attending in another city) and he was all for it, on the hopes that my son would be more receptive to somebody different. After talking with the Pastor tho, a couple of days later, he wants to keep trying, so I won't be discussing bringing a third party in, with him, yet.
While I was at church, in the other city, I did briefly discuss the the other pastor's wife about her husband being willing to intervene and talking with my son. I received a call from him last night, from the pastor at the other church, and we discussed the situation. Right now he doesn't feel now is the time, I happen to agree with him because the Pastor wants to keep trying. I filled him in some more stuff cause he asked some questions and he is going to pray about it. He did say that if this continues for another couple of months then he would be willing. He will keep the idea and my son in prayer, as well as, myself in prayer, also the Pastor. This is the kind of support that I need to keep on moving on in my life.
My family is so important to me, it is just too bad that my son can't seem to see that. Too bad he can't seem to see past whatever garbage he is dealing with to let bygones be bygones. I know that my son is very stubborn yet it seems that he should know better by virtue of the things that he has been taught by me, youth group, experienced in YWAM for two years and in any other ways that God has used to teach him different principles. Right now I don't really recognize the person who seems to be my son, he looks like my son yet he doesn't act like my son. Also, he doesn't treat me like the young man that I raised my son to be, or the one that came back from YWAM, the last time. I also taught him to talk to people when you have a problem with them, yet he has yet to do exactly that. I really am working on not dwelling in the "pile of crap" as my therapist puts it, because it just is not health.
I want to focus on how I can help people that are in the situation I was in and on my physical health. I have been having issues with my right hip popping out of place, and my chiropractor says the heavy people have problems with that. Well, I have been taking steps to keep that from happen again. Paying attention to how I sit, and drastic food changes so that I can loose weight. When my hip pops out of place it is very painful, then when my knee follows suit, that adds to the pain especially when I have to bend down. I seriously needs to loose like 100lbs in order to be a healthy weight and my blood pressure is high, I want to stop taking the blood pressure medication along with the medication for the triglycerides. That is my goal, a little at a time.
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