New Experience

11/24/14 -- {7/18/14}  I don't think I have ever been so glad to get home as I was that day, from shopping.  I have heard plenty of stories from people that have experienced panic attacks but I, myself, have never experienced one, before today.  That was the strangest experience ever.  My heart was racing, I just had this urgent need to bolt out of the store.  Thankfully I was done with my shopping, it just meant that I wasn't going to be getting anything extra, I went directly to the check out, paid for my stuff and left.  I didn't even go to F&F to get some stuff for my kitties like I wanted because I just couldn't bring myself to go into another store.
    When I got home, I sat down and collected myself, and made a mental note to make sure that I mention it to my Psychiatrist and Therapist to see what they thought about the experience.
  At the very same time I was experiencing this panic attack, I received a text from a special young friend, C, requesting that I help at her wedding reception.  That request caused me to actually to take a step back and reread the text, it brought tears to my eyes.  To this day, she has absolutely no idea how much that simple request meant to me. We, texted back and for a few then I headed out of the store, of course, after paying for the stuff I went in there to get.  This young lady has been awesome to watch blossom in her growth in the Lord and as a young lady. Then, to watch as a relationship between a special man and her grows and blossoms ultimately culminating in a very beautiful marriage has been awesome.
The marriage ceremony was the first one in a very long time where the bride was actually veiled.  It's almost as if the "veiled bride" as gone out of fashion, which I think that is something that should always be a long standing tradition.   (Sorry, I did jump a little too far ahead)
   One of the major struggles that I had, for a number of days -- especially on the 4th of July when I saw that dumb picture; I wanted to gather everything I have in my place, pertaining to somebody, and dump it all where they would see it.  Seeing some of them every day seriously causes me pain, I really didn't know what to do about it.